The Monkeys
or
Human Society Since the Beginning of Time

There was once a group of monkeys
Who had a bunch of banana trees
And they were content for a time.

Then one day the banana supply started to dwindle.
A bold monkey said, "Look at those stupid monkeys over there.
They've got lots and lots of banana trees.
Let's kill them and take their bananas!"

And all the other monkeys shouted "YEAH!"
And beat their chests and hooted and hollered.

Then, a less bold monkey said,
"Why don't we just ask them to help us plant more banana trees?"
And the bold monkey said,
"No... that's too much bother.
Letís just kill them and take their bananas!"

And all the other monkeys shouted "YEAH!"
And yelped and yawped and capered and cavorted.

"But... they are monkeys, just like us..."
The less bold monkey bravely continued.

"Well... actually...
Theyíre not really like us.
I've heard tell that
They fling their shit with their left hand instead of their right.
Therefore, they are bad.
In fact, they're evil!
In fact, they're not even monkeys at all!
So, let's kill them and take their bananas!"

And all the other monkeys shouted "YEAH!"
And howled and shrieked and jumped up and down
And went to get their throwing rocks and pointed sticks.

The End. Rinse and repeat ad infinitum.

David Aronson
April 2024